Today, we will be looking at “What God does not want from you as a lady and as a wife.”
1. He does not want you to be
disobedient or rebellious to your
husband. God wants you as a wife to be obedient and submissive to your husband. Let’s look at the scriptures IN LIKE manner, you married women, be submissive to your own husbands [subordinate yourselves as being secondary to and dependent on them, and adapt yourselves to them], so that even if any do not obey the Word [of God], they may be won over not by discussion but by the [godly] lives of their wives, When they observe the pure and modest way in which you conduct yourselves, together with your reverence [for your husband; you are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere him--to honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and, in the human sense, to adore him, that is, to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love, and enjoy your husband]. (1Pe 3:1-2 AMP)
Now wives, there is no way you follow the above scripture and you will not have victory in your marriage. Why? Because it is the word of God and His word never fails. Take a look at it again! You are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere him--to honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and, in the human sense, to adore him, that is, to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love, and enjoy your husband]. That is how to make
you husband love you like no man’s business! Before you give up in that marriage, before you start complaining, make sure you obey what God instructs you to do here. Notice that includes uncooperative husbands. The scripture says you can win them over by your attitude! That is how powerful a woman is. As a single lady, giving in to pre-marital sex is not submission. Don’t even think about it. They are miles apart. You are to stoutly refuse and disobey him in regard to that in order to preserve the relationship and preserve your destiny. If he wants to go because you won’t give in to sex, let him go! His name may be Abednego! He is not your husband. If he is, he will not be putting pressure on you to compromise your virtue.
2. He does not want you to place your work/career before your family. You should never make that mistake. Your family comes first and the wife is really the home-maker. If you do not put priority on your home, you make your husband vulnerable and make the children grow in abdefective way. While it is good to pursue your career, your family must come first. Too many women have pursued their career at the expense of losing their husbands and children. The key here is balance. As singles ladies, be open to friendship as you grow, pursue your career and don’t be isolated.
3. He does not want you to live a life of depression and unhappiness. God wants you to be
a happy wife! He wants you to create an atmosphere of joy in the home and not that ofvgloominess and despondency. A woman can literally change the mood in the house! That is how powerful women are. Take it easy. Be humorous. Learn to relax and don’t be toovclosed up in your own worldview. A cheerful heart brings a smile to your face; a sad heart makes it hard to get through the
day. (Pro 15:13 MSG) As a single lady, be cheerful and don’t let that melancholic look to take over your
countenance or else the very husband you want to attract can change his mind upon sighting your face even though God has spoken to him! So cheer up! Cast you care on Jesus and don’t allow worry to bend you over. Guys like their ladies straight! Yes, I know depressive thoughts will come but you must learn to handle them God’s way! We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers
erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ.
(2Co 10:5 MSG)
4. He does not want you to get involved with adulterous relationships. Don’t try to revenge
on your husband’s attitude by developing affairs with colleagues and friends. It may make your flesh feel good in revenge, but in the real sense of it, it will bring untold anguish and heartache. Your life will slip down to that of deception, lies and other false intrigues. Thebconscience can become seared until one sees nothing wrong in having adulterous flings just to feel good and ‘enjoy life”. Don’t cheat on your husband, the consequences are debilitating and crushing. Adultery is a stolen pleasure and the spiritual implications are
not good for anybody. Stolen bread tastes sweet, but soon your mouth is full of gravel. (Pro 20:17 MSG)
As single ladies, don’t keep one guy in Nigeria and the other in USA while you are collecting money from both of them. That way, you are training your heart in adultery drama that won’t end happily thereafter.
5. He does not want you to provoke your children unnecessarily. God does not want you to take out what you feel or how you feel on the children. Don’t transfer your aggression on them or else they will grow up doing exactly the same things to their siblings and then their spouses. What you do to children and around them go a long way to influence their thought patterns and outlook to life. Fathers, do not provoke or irritate or fret your children [do not be hard on them or harass them], lest they become discouraged and sullen and morose and feel inferior and frustrated. [Do not break their spirit.] (Col 3:21 AMP)
Parents, don't come down too hard on your children or you'll crush their spirits. (Col 3:21 MSG) As single ladies, can you cope with children or they irritate you? If they do, it is something you need to work on.
6. He does not want you to deny your husband sexual pleasure. Never do this for any reason! It is unwise under any circumstance unless of course you are certain that your husband would transmit STDs as a result of his lifestyle.Many wives have unwittingly
pushed their husbands into the waiting hands of adulterous women by starving their husbands with sex. It is not a wise thing to do. Sex means to your husband much more than it means to you! Let me drive home the point with this illustration. A couple held themselves in a good embrace at night and in a split second the husband is ready for sex and was warming up for that. To his consternation, the wife said “No. “I just wanted you to hold me, that’s all, no sex!” The husband, all worked up went to bed with serious headache. A few days after that, they went on a shopping spree. The wife saw some jewelry, clothes, designer shoes and the husband asked her to pick them all. Then she saw skirt suits, and trouser suits. The husband still said she could pick them. She was enraptured. As they move over to the counter to pay, the husband said, No! I just wanted you to hold them. Hold them tight, that’s all!
As singles ladies, God does not want you in pre-marital sex or making out. What is wrong is wrong!
7. He does not want you to nag or disrespect your husband. Nagging is dangerous to marriage! Every man detests it. It will never work, so don’t resort to it.
8. He does not want you to discuss your husband with others. Never make that mistake. That male colleague that seems to have a listening ear is really looking for ways to take you to bed at the end of the day. With a few exception, though. That other guy with whom both of you exchange marital challenges and how your spouses have not been good is not a good relationship to keep. There would soon be emotional affair and then it will be taken to a physical level if care is not taken.
As single ladies, do not close your eyes to bad and wrong attitude in your fiancée. Every bad and negative tendency you see will leave the level of proclivities and graduate into full bloom after marriage, so in borrowing the Nigerian lingo “shine your eye well!”
